I sat on the chair gazing at his face, which had stopped breathing some hours ago. Tears welled up every moment I looked at him. A giant of a man of faith had breathed his last breath. It was a gloomy day and a sense of helplessness suddenly descended. It was unbelievable what had happened. The thought of not being able to see him anymore on this earth was overwhelming. A fearless, genuine and simple man of faith and prayer had entered into glory.
Dad was an evangelist of the gospel of Christ. "You lived 10 months of life in your mother's womb, and now this is a fake world that your living in but one day you will die and you would need to go to the true world", he said to a small crowd as he told them about Jesus Christ. He died for all of us because we have all sinned and cannot reach God. On other ocassions he said: "Jesus said - love one another as I have loved you. Jesus loved us without expecting anything in return. This body is the temple of the living God. Keep Jesus in your heart and love one another". I looked up to him as a kid. He was a man with convictions and no compromise.
He used to be a very sophisticated person before he accepted Jesus as his personal saviour. He had a gold chain that ran till his tummy and he looked very stylish. However once he found Jesus Christ, he started living a very simple and humble life. Being an engineer with the Tamil Nadu Electricity board, his friends tell me that he chose to ignore the status that comes with being an officer for the cause of Christ. The only time I saw him use his status as an officer was when people unknowingly criticized him that he was using overseas funds. "I have a bachelor of engineer degree in electrical engineering and work in the electricity board. I use my own money to do this", he defended. One could see him in the bustands distributing pamphlets or in the street corners spreading the gospel. He spoke with conviction and people listened to him.
Dad worked at office and in the evenings he used to share the gospel. Every monday we had prayer meetings at home from 7:00 PM. I remember him sweating it out as he preached to the people who had come to attend the meetings. He counselled the people who needed it and prayed for them. He had a big heart. I have seen him taking out big currencies from his pocket to help people who needed it. These times I used to proudly think:"That's my dad".
He resigned his job when he was 50 years old and came out for full time ministry, something which was close to his heart. I had the opportunity of praying with him and helping him stand by what he chose when he needed support for the decision he had taken, a change which would cause monetary shortage for the family.
Dad did not love penny, pleasure nor power. He was a known at office as a gentleman who was straight forward and honest. He had a reputation of not taking any bribes at a time when his surroundings were corrupt and corruption was rampant. A friend of his remembers a time when asking for directions to dad's office desk, his colleague in order to confirm, remarked: "Are you looking for Mr. Ponraj who has the reputation of not taking bribes ?"
He ran away from comforts and never allowed himself to take rest beyond the night sleeps that was needed. He did not have a telivision home and did not know anything about any actors or cinema. He hardly knew to converse on any subject other than the bible. He lived a pure and holy life, He hardly bought new cloathes and never wore expensive ones. I remember buying him a pair of sandals for about INR 2500 which he never wore on seeing the price tag. Later when he had to go to the hospital, I remember convincing him to wear this new pair of sandals.
Dad had a beautiful and genuine heart but was harsh and blunt as well at the same time. He did not trust anyone except God. Not everyone understood him. He had no grey areas: it was either right or wrong and a grey area was wrong. He did not compromise on anything. When he knew something or someone was wrong, he confronted the person head on even if it meant to sever ties with the person. He had no guile nor revenge. Sometimes when he felt he had incorrectly confronted a person, he longed for forgiveness. He did not want to be politically correct but wanted to be eternally right.
Around 8 months back, when Dad fell sick, one could see the way he gently and courageously fought a terminal disease. Gently when he was weak and down, courageously when he had the strength to do so. For more than 20 years, every Friday he used to visit the patients in the hospital to pray with them and help them but hardly did he ever take care of his own health. A giant of a man taken to glory to be with Jesus Christ, whom he loved dearly. He lived this life unknown to people and died unkown, only because he wanted to make one person popular: Jesus Christ and to make him known among the poor.
Proud of you, Dad. Till we meet on the other shore...
