Couple of days back, a gentleman with whom I was out of touch for more than a year called me and within seconds of the conversation asked me how old I was.
“39 years”, I replied to which he exclaimed in an exaggerated superlative tone “oh no, oh my world, you are old!”.
I exactly knew what was going in his mind when he made the remark.
One thing which we cannot control in life is the time which doesn’t pause as per our desires, but marches on consistently.
King Solomon writes the following in Ecclesiastes 3:
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance
This being profound I like to always look back and pen down some of the times of being planted, healed and being built up. The other positives of laughing and dancing is something foreign to me but I do rejoice in sobriety.
Over the years, I have prioritized my time into strengthening myself and deepening into unconventional investments and there has never been a regret - investing in healthy faith, being with people in need and personal fitness which has blessed me with rich dividends. The joy of living a life - holy and clean has been a blessing and I am ever thankful for the grind in the early 20’s which helped me be disciplened all along in the 30’s.
People unknown to me personally refer to me as the bicyclist, as I enjoy riding approx 40 kilometres 2 or 3 times a week to work or the government office. The officers at the government office feel pity on me and even though they don’t treat me well often, they at least don’t ask for bribes since they feel sorry for me, thinking that I cant afford a motorised vehicle.
If asked to pick a specific memorable incident over the years, the search to help Amudha find her biological mother in 2022 stands out. She comes from a small village in Netherlands and had appeared in a dutch national documentary in the year 2019 where she had mentioned to the interviewer that she was possibly stolen as a Child from India and given for adoption.
This was because the hospital where she was born was in the news in the year 2000 as they had caught some human traffickers red handed when they tried to steal babies and give them up for international adoption. The adoption home in Chennai, India was since closed and the case was handed over to the Central Bureau of investigation (CBI) , the top most official investigating agency in India. The founder unable to bear the stress of the investigation committed suicide and there was a roadblock to the investigation.
Back in the Netherlands, the dutch government had halted international adoptions after this documentary was aired. This was the circumstance when she called me up during covid late 2021 and asked me if I could help her to find her biological family. She had never seen me but had heard of me and contacted me via Facebook several times to check on the possibility of finding her parents . I did agree to help her against the advice all of my well wishers, friends, pastors and my own family, who were unhappy with me going ahead with the search.The reason being she was travelling alone and I would be responsible for anything which happens to her in India.
Since I was working in the investment banking division of a multi national bank, there was a critical migration project planned when she landed. Even though I had already requested for a week of leave there was an indirect urge from my company to cancel the leave since it meant that I could not showcase my skills during an important phase of time a work. However I did prioritise this search against my own work even though I wasn’t sure if it would yield me any results.
The night before the trip to Salem, Amudha's birth place in Tamil Nadu, I was awake until 2 AM, with my mom not comfortable with me travelling alone with her and hence she wanted to accompany me. Then being covid time , I did not want my mom to accompany me lest she could catch the virus. Finally we agreed the I would take her in the train to Salem.
The plan was to go to the Salem municipal office which maintains the citizens register and enquire with them about the possibility of her name being in the birth records of the city and eventually try to get the parents details and address. This looked impossible since the adoption documents are often changed with a fabricated story, however we wanted to try to get some clue to help us with the search.
When we approached the officer in the Salem municipal office, he just acknowledged our request as a formality and told us he would get back after checking the records. I went back and explained to him about the situation after standing again in the queue but he seemed indifferent. We had apparently hit a roadblock after a couple of attempts. I lingered around for a while trying to get more information but eventually as the officers went out for lunch we decided to go get lunch ourselves.
Once in the restaurant, Amudha took a couple of video's to add to her experience of her birth city and we decided that it was wise to go back to Chennai. It was 25 January 2022 and there was a republic day parade on 26 January 2022 in Chennai along the marina beach side, and this was something she wanted to experience in Chennai. The earliest train tickets I could find online was a train departing at 10:00 PM and it was just 02:00 PM in the city and moreover we had taken a tiring morning journey.
Amudha wanted to check if there was a hotel nearby where she could rest for a while and also use the toilets. I enquired about hotels nearby and each of them refused saying that there were no rooms. Deliberately, in the start of the conversation I mentioned to book 2 rooms until 6 PM since we have a train to catch at 10:00 PM to avoid any misunderstanding. However the jeering and the mocking laughter of the housekeeping staff and the hotel manager who would not even respond properly to the request broke me down. In a shame culture and being highly sensitive I could exactly figure out what they were thinking.
They were thinking I was trying to illegitimately do something wrong, whereas I am trying to help a desperate girl whom I have never seen until a week back, like my own sister.
Completely brokenhearted, I went back to the Salem municipal office and helped Amudha find a rest room. While I was back in the waiting area in tears.
"Do I really need to do this?"
"I have a good job and I lead a noble and holy life but most of the times being falsely accused and misunderstood"
"What is the use of helping when it doesn't yield any result and you are just mocked? " all these thoughts were continuously flowing through in my mind.
When Amudha came back I made myself calm, composed myself and asked her if we could go to the Salem government hospital which was nearby and spend time there as we wait for the train.
Once in the Salem government hospital, we were strolling along various departments when I then asked for the direction to the maternity and child birth ward so that we can try to at least talk to someone. After some time we came across a department which registers new born children. There was this nice gentleman Mohan kumar who heard our story and directed us to a licensed stamp vendor office, near the Salem Municpal office who could help us with the birth records.
Once in the stamp vendor office he helped me see the records until the point when I got to a place where the name of the mother and daughter were mentioned as Amudha and Amudha respectively. The stamp vendor guy now closed the page and he was not willing to help me further. He felt that he would be overruling the work of the Municipal officer who was supposed to help me and my plea was falling on deaf ears. After continuously pleading with him for an hour I had to give up exactly at 06:00 PM since the gentlemen closed the shop partially and went to the mosque as the namaz siren was sounded.
I hurried swiftly back to the hospital since I strongly felt there was a clue and I needed to get the address in the link. Amudha was taking pictures of women selling flowers and vegetables in the pavement but I had to quickly take her along to the hospital to meet Mohan.
"Probably my mom looks like one of these flower vendors", she whispered to me.
Once back in the hospital, I saw Mohan again and pleaded with him if he could get me the address with the given date of birth and the one which had both Mother's and daughter's name as Amudha. He was sitting behind a veiled glass window and there was only one small opening, meant to receive or give a paper or money through your hand. He enquired with me the reason why the stamp vendor guy did not give and he felt that it was completely alright to give the address.
Since I had sat together with the stamp vendor for a while, I could see what was the exact page where the name appeared and I gave it to Mohan who quickly printed out the address for me - I was elated and I remember giving Mohan a 500 rupee note, as a gift but he politely refused. There are good people who still exist and I would like to thank Mohan if I get an opportunity to visit Salem again.
Having the address as a clue, we were supposed to go to a place in Dharmapuri and I had to rely on the local autorickshaws since Google Maps wasnt showing the correct location as it is a real remote village.
I discussed with Amudha if we were ok to search in Dharmapuri. The place was approx 50 kilometres away which would also mean that we could probably miss the 10:00 PM train in case we are late on the return journey. It was a huge risk to be taken since if we miss the train we will not get a hotel taking into account my earlier experience with the hotel management. Amudha agreed we take the risk and there we started on with the search.
I negotiated with the autorickshaw driver for a deal of about 1500 rupees approx to visit the address and bring us back. Once we were in the autorickshaw towards Dharmapuri, it was a crazy nervous journey. Amudha was taking videos and I was praying with mixed feelings of going along a dark road in Salem and being responsible for someone who had trusted me and come from afar.
After enquiring with several people we got to first address and learnt that there used to be this family who had vacated 10-15 years back. We were referred to a local politician, a councillor who on seeing Amudha said she resembles her mother. It was already a hair raising moment to hear that and further he mentioned that after the death of her dad, her mom relocated to another village.
We quickly were given the phone number of a gentleman who was an ayurvedic doctor who knows the place where Amudha's mom currently was residing.
The autorickshaw driver co-operated and after we had exchanged some phone numbers, we finally got in touch with an elderly gentleman who would guide us to the place where her family resides in Poosaripatti.
It was a nail-biting moment as we came inside a big compound with two or three homes built inside, the calm night would soon be lit up with people who invited us inside.
Once inside the house, there were a lot of hushed conversations going on in whispers and I wanted to be double sure that we are in the right place. As I was observing and talking with the people in the house, Amudha's sister Jennifer suddenly came in sobbing continuously. She had been told from when she was a kid that she had a younger sister given for adoption so she was overwhelmed to see her. Slowly her mom was called and she spoke some words on the phone with Amudha for the first time - what a time full of tears and joy it was. To confirm that we were on the right address, the family gave us a letter which was written several years back kept in draft which was written by a lawyer mentioning the parents intent to see Amudha. So the parents had voluntarily given their daughter for adoption and it was a closure to all the tears, fears and trauma over the 23 years she suffered not knowing who her mother was.
My work was done but Amudha was still not comfortable to be left alone, she wanted me to initially stay in a nearby room in the night. However after a couple of hours she gave me permission to leave. The mother was supposed to come and meet her the next morning. Apparently the relatives of Amudha's mother were doing really well except her mom who was looking after an elderly person as her job.
As I bid goodbye, I knew I had missed the train since it was already 11:30 PM but I was happy that she was in safe hands and elated that taking the risk worked. The whole trip as I was travelling back to Chennai by a midnight bus was filled with emotions - I couldn't help but be in tears. I have gone through quite some stuff in life - many dramatic incidents but God was using all the experience to be involved in a dramatic rescue search.
The trust that is what I long to maintain in life’s journey and also multiply the talents given to me and use for God’s glory as I go ahead with life until I hear - “Well done, thou good and faithful servants!”
Write up of the incident from the press (that the address of the location was received from a missionary is not true) :
https://www.newindianexpress.com/states/tamil-nadu/2022/jan/29/netherlands-woman-meets-biological-mom-after-23-years-2412732.html
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